A Corinthians Christmas...

A friend of mine emailed this to me and I knew the minute I started reading it I needed to share it.  I wish I knew who the author was but alas, the email said "unknown".
Whomever you are, thank you.

A Christmas Version of 1 Corinthians 13

As you prepare your heart and home for Christmas this year,

consider the following words of wisdom and have Christ be the

center and essence of your celebration.

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of

twinkling lights and shiny balls, but do not show love to my

family, I'm just another decorator.

If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas

cookies, preparing gourmet meals and arranging a beautifully

adorned table at mealtime, but do not share the true meaning of

Christmas, I'm just another cook.

If I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home and

give all that I have to charity, but do not demonstrate

kindness to strangers, it profits me nothing.

If I attend a myriad of holiday parties and sing in the choir but do

not focus on Christ, I have missed the point.

Love stops the cooking to hug the child. Love sets aside the

decorating to kiss the husband. Love is kind, though harried

and tired.

Love doesn't envy another's home that has coordinated Christmas

china and table linens. Love doesn't yell at the kids to get

out of the way, but is thankful they are there to be in the

way.

Love doesn't give only to those who are able to give in return

but rejoices in giving to those who can't.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,

and endures all things. Love never fails.

Video games will break, pearl necklaces will be lost, golf

clubs will rust, but giving the gift of love will endure.

-Author Unknown

Thanksgiving and Giving Thanks...

I'm praying that everyone's Thanksgiving was a beautiful one :)

Mine didn't quit turn out the way I had planned unfortunately.  Got sick (possibly bronchitis), BEYOND major traffic to see the in-laws, haven't really slept much for the last few days (cuz I got sick), missed Black Friday with my girl (cuz I got sick), my girl got her heart broken (which in turn broke mine), and I couldn't even hardly taste the turkey (cuz I got sick).

BUT!!!  I sit here tonight, looking at all that has happened, choosing to let go, choosing to forgive, getting better and most of all giving thanks because God has answered a big HUGE prayer of mine!  He is faithful and He cares.  I'm so grateful that I am "worth more than many sparrows".

(Luke 12:6,7)

Happy Fall Everyone!

Forgiveness, Peace and Overwhelming Joy.....

It's funny sometimes.  God does something in our lives and then tells us to hold on to it.  I guess He is telling me that now is the time to share...  :)

Last year, our spring proffered up a kaleidoscope of color!  It was the most stunning, most cataclysmic display I have EVER been witness too.  "Amazing" just doesn't cut it. I've longed for that this year.  With lack of rain, our Hill Country has suffered greatly.  Along with photographers :(  Sometime again soon I hope, VERY soon is my prayer.

I was out shooting one crisp, fresh, cool afternoon (these are a dime a dozen out here!) while waiting for my daughter's meeting to finish before I picked her up from school.  I was blessed to have another "photog walk with God".  I love those.  I miss them.  I need to go again.

I had been struggling with some serious, heart-wrenching, life-breaking, tear-weeping issues for the last year and didn't know how I was going to pull through.  I had lost my best friend.  Not through literal death mind you, but through the lies and pain the enemy plots to inflict upon those that love the Lord.  We were intertwined she and I.  Inseparable.  Sisters.  Even our families had seemed to morph into one.  What a joy it was to be together!  All the time.  I know now that God used this to prepare both of us, well.... all of us for what was to come.  Different paths.  Different directions.  But the pain, the horrible, gut-wrenching, bawl-your-eyes-out, devastating pain... was almost too much to bear.

That day, on the side of the road, God loved me.  He showed me His glory.  He wrapped His arms around me and LITERALLY with a whirlwind of His breath, took all the pain.  The hurt, the unforgiveness... gone.  Poof... just like that!!!  I mean it!  As His breath (through a funnel of wind) twirled around me, I felt it all throughout my body!  The adrenaline rushed through my veins, my heart started to pound, my ears started to tingle and goose bumps broke out all over my arms and legs.  It was GONE!  The heaviness, the excruciating weight of it all.... gone.  My heart cried out and He answered.  He even let me capture it on film so I would forever be reminded that He is in control.  He heals, He orchestrates, He loves, and I can do all things through Him that gives me strength!  Praise be His Name FOREVER!

Brandon Heath, "Your Love"

Have you ever heard a song that makes you want to spend all day in front of the speakers, blasting the sound, letting all else fade away, tears streaming, arms raised, feet dancing and twirling? All day? This is mine ♥

lyrics

Providence...

While my life has somewhat turned upside down, and the reality of it changing anytime soon is yet to be determined, I have one joy that I can rely on.... God's providence.

He spreads the path before me, loving me always, divinely interceding on my behalf and on the behalf of those around me.  A very precious friend of mine has now found the path God has chosen for him.  Growing up in a home where his father was the epitome of Paul, walking out his salvation, and showing his son how to do the same; my friend has seen that he is to share the book of Philippians with all who will listen.  He has started an incredible ministry that will blow your mind if you ever get the chance to see it.  He felt called to share God's and Paul's love for the church by memorizing the entire book of Philippians and presenting a dramatic interpretation of it.

Ironically, this friend's name is Philip.  Philip Smith (Phil, as I get to lovingly refer to him).  Phil majored in theater arts and is a PHENOMENAL artist.  He and his wife own their own painting business, Walls Across Texas, and have even developed their own peg board design, NoSho Pegboard, that many commercial businesses (and individuals) have discovered is a fabulous camouflage for their display modules.

Not only is Phil incredibly talented in the artistic side of theater and set design, he is a FANTABULOUS dramatic speaker!  We joyfully got to participate in a Sunday school class where he energetically read the Narnia books to both children and adults alike :).  Amazing, fantastic, preciously sweet; Phil is a man that I will always count as a friend.

I was blessed recently to see Phil's presentation on the book of Philippians and was unbelievably moved.  He "becomes" Paul as he presents it to the church, us, me.  He shared his God given vision for this with me after wards and asked if I would help him take some photographs for his brochures.  I was thrilled he'd even think of me and all too happy to agree.  We tried to get together several times before the holidays and find the perfect setting.  I really wanted to do it at a certain place (very authentic looking for a backdrop) but unfortunately it never panned out.  We decided we would attempt it again after the holidays were over and things settled down.

This is where God's divine hand comes into play.  Last weekend I went to my CBS (Community Bible Study) leadership retreat at the Highland Lakes Camp & Conference Center.  I had just arrived, checked in, put my stuff into my room and was headed to the dining hall for dinner when who do I see?  PHIL!  He was there to do his presentation for our group!!!!!!  He even had his new set (which he had designed and painted) that we were hoping to use for the pictures!!!  God REALLY surprises me sometimes :D

After Phil's moving rendition, I was privileged to hang back with them and snap a few shots.  Funny thing, I almost didn't even bring my camera with me!  God's voice rang in the back of my mind before I left, "you know you'll find something you want to take a picture of and then you'll be kicking yourself for not bringing it".  I've done this enough, you'd think it would be automatic for me to grab that bag and not have a second thought about it.  Apparently I'm still learning, lol!

It amazes me how God's hand was continually on us during our vacation, while I was on my retreat, and during every day of my life.  His providence rings true in my daily travels and trials.  He is God and He loves me.  Thank you Father God for NEVER leaving me nor forsaking me.  For always guiding me and answering prayers, even the tiny ones.  I love you!

Forever and for always,

Your little girl.

(By the way, you know I'm His favorite right?)  ;)

Sweet Sunset Promises

Alas, I am a happy woman.  Well, I generally am one anyway but tonight, especially so.

After having to take my baby (11yr old baby) to the doc for ear infections :(, picking up groceries, waiting on the meds, and canceling a play date (photogin' with a precious friend), heading home I saw something.  Something amazing.  Something growing.  Something that was about to take my breath away.  I saw the signs and couldn't ignore them.

For over a year now, I've been dying to get another fabulous sunset.  I've evaluated my way through every season, every possible location (preferably void of electrical lines) and ashamedly, missed MANY!  I have realized that part of the recipe to capturing a spectacular sunset consists of several things.  Clouds, ribbons of clouds actually.  Too many or too fuzzy and they block too much of the sun.  Calm.  No 90 mile an hour winds (that's just my personal preference, whether it affects a sunset, don't really know).  Winter.  I think this is important.  I have tried for MANY months to find another sunset like the one I took last February.  I've tried and tried but found nothing as showy and splendiforous as I have seen in winter.  No science that I've looked up, just gesture based on personal experience.  The last item you need.... your camera.  You think I'm just being silly.  Nope, you may remember my venting about this same subject not long ago.

After slapping myself, many times over the last few months, I finally had to just hand it over to God and ask Him to provide the moment.  The perfect sunset (and help to have my camera on hand).  Well, whether this is the one He planned on or if this is just a tease for an even BETTER one; He promised, AND delivered!

Tonight, I saw the makings of what proved to be a most magnificent display.  I prayed the whole way home (didn't have the camera with me, of course!).  I took MULTITUDES of deep breathes.  Prayed, breathed, prayed, breathed and then I realized something.  He wouldn't show me what He was about to do only to not help me get there in time.  Trust.  I had to trust Him.

What a wonderful God He is!  Not only did I get there in time, but it all worked beautifully, even down to the gloves I had just put in the car.... TODAY!  I love His promises.  So simple, so gentle, so true and trustworthy.  If He cares to give me a gift as simple as a sunset, what MORE does He desire for me????  Almost like getting Christmas everyday.  Oh, wait... it is :D

This is comprised of three images, processed with my new PSE9 program, using the Panoramic option :D

Life lessons in a bowl of breakfast...

I am trying (italicize, bold and STAR this!) to change the way I do things.  I need to eat better, exercise, and de-stress (insert exasperated sigh here).  I decided to try some different grains (instead of bad carb loaded pasta) that I found from HEB.  One such package was bulgar wheat.  Hmmmm..... In my search for better breakfast ideas I thought I'd treat it like oatmeal and make it hot (we play with our food here :D).

I'm a sugar FREAK and therefore I'm also attempting to utilize other means of adding flavor and sweetness to things.  I had some canned plums a friend had given to me and I thought I'd make a plum sauce.  Add a little agave nectar for sweetness and I'd be set.

I opened the can and started to mash up the plums.  What in the world??????  PITS!  There were HUGE pits!  Every single plum had a massive pit in it.  I got so upset.  I didn't have time to deal with pits, grrrrr!  There were probably 15 plums in that can!  What had I gotten myself into?!?!?

I started muttering under my breath how stupid the canning people must be.  I mean really, who wants CANNED plums WITH the pits?!?!?  It's not like you'll be picking up the plums and nibbling around them.  The time it would have taken the factory to de-pit them would have been only seconds compared to how long it was taking me to slog around in the mushy plum mess to search for and eradicate them.  What goobers!  I shouldn't have to deal with pits!  I mean REALLY?!?!?!

 Awww dang :(   Life lesson moment.

Pits ARE the pits!  I hate them.  They cause me stress, they take up my time, they HURT if I'm not paying attention and I bite into one.  Plus, they are down right ugly and just a plan nuisance. Truth moment.  Who am I to think that life should never have any pits?  Even Christ said we would have pits.  In John 16:33 He says, 

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

So, we have a choice.  We can stumble upon the pits.  Grumble and complain about them.  Try to find a way to avoid them, refuse them (good luck) and throw a MASSIVE pit-y party (teehee).... OR...  We can remember that they will happen.  Be on the look out for them.  Expect them and move through them.  We can embrace them knowing that He will grow us through them. We can look to Him not focusing on the pits in the bowl.  We can focus on the yummy result instead of the pain we have to go through to get there.

Bulgar wheat cereal with plum sauce was DEFINITELY worth the effort of dealing with the pits.  If I had given up and not bothered with the plums, I never would have experienced the joy of eating them :)

 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,

because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."  James 1:2-4

CBS: Letting your little light shine....

I have the joyous pleasure every Tuesday to participate in something so wonderful, so heart warming, so uplifting and so beautiful it makes my heart smile from here to Kalamazoo.  CBS.  No, NOT the tv station (heaven forbid, lol!), Community Bible Study.  I joined CBS almost 8yrs ago.  I started because my life was falling apart.  My dad had just died suddenly of a massive heart attack (2wks before they were going to be here for Christmas). We were trying to sell the house (9/11 had just happened), my husband was living an hour away (we only saw him one day a week) and I was raising 3 little kids (two babies) all by myself.  Life was a living hell.

I needed help.  I needed "Him", God, Jesus.  Him.  The only way I knew how to survive was to find Him.  The only way I knew how to find Him was to attend a Bible study.  There had to be answers there, right?  Right :D  Not only did I find Him, I found an unbelievable support group in women that loved the Lord and sought after Him with their whole hearts.  Women that went through even greater tragedy than I had but continued to serve Him with their entire being.  Woman who can cut a joke and roll on the floor laughing one minute and then turn around and speak immeasurable praises and thanksgiving to Him, praying for the deepest needs of loved ones, crying out to Him for each other.  This is where I was meant to be.  Always, every year.  This is where EVERYONE needs to be.

I joined the leadership part of CBS I guess about 6yrs ago.  This is my "core group".  And I have the best one ;) (insert inside joke here).  CBS runs during the school year and breaks when public schools break, all holidays and during summer.  Even though we "officially" take breaks, we still get to see each other in the summer with a luncheon once a month, we get to have a beautiful Christmas dinner with each other every year, and this year we even did something extra special.  We had a fall fellowship.  We made special designs in pumpkins, baked and decorated cookies and played games.

The goal of this was to celebrate friendship and God's changing of the season. Since my family doesn't set up for Halloween, I wasn't too certain if I wanted to carve anything and if I did, what in the world would I do, lol!  He reminded me that He is the light of the world and that others needed to know that.  I decided to google scriptures on "light".  When I read John 8:12, I knew what I would do.

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said,

“I am the light of the world.

Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

These women are such a testimony to me.  They love with a love that is so deep and so real.  They love, sharing in each others joy or sadness, making it their own.  What a beautiful gift He gave me.  Not just in His word, but in His women.  I love you all from the deepest depths of my heart.  Thank you for all you have been for me over the years.  Thank you for being willing vessels and "letting your little lights shine"!

Even the dog had fun, lol!!!

Cookies.... YUM!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVED the collaborated efforts on this fairytale/cinderella pumpkin!  Sooooo cute!!!  She used an apple corer and melon baller to make the polka dots.

Unfortunately my design didn't hold up to the test of time.  It ended up full of toothpicks holding it together, lol!  I tried :(

What a cute idea!  Just carving a design on the outside layer.  I think this would have been a better idea for mine.

"Being a Christian is like being a pumpkin.

God lifts you up, takes you in, and washes

All the dirt off of you.

He opens you up, touches you deep inside.

He scoops out all of the yucky stuff, including

The seeds of doubt, hate, and greed.

Then He carves you a new smiling face and

Puts his light inside you

For all the world to see."

Artichoke hearts and a cute little pair of red shoes...

These two simple items may not drum up the word "hope" for you but for some, they are the pure essence of it.

My Friday's consist of several things.  Getting up at the crack of dawn, well, shortly there after  (this is a miracle for those that truly know me).  Getting two children dressed, fed, lunches made, books together, water bottles filled,  myself dressed, hopefully fed and out the door.  We are part of a home school group called "HEART Club", Home Educators Activities for Righteous Training.  It is full of wonderful women that love the Lord and allow Him to use them anyway He can.

HEART Club consists of multiple hours in which we have PE, two class hours and now an optional "outdoor" class, graciously offered by the place sponsoring us this year, Camp Peniel.  It's a wonderful Christian camp in a BEAUTIFUL location in the hill country.  It's farther away from home (meaning I have to rise and shine much earlier) but sooo worth it.  It was by God's design and purpose we had to change locations.  I complained inwardly at first, I mean let's be honest, who wants to get up that early?!?  But now.... NO complaints outta this momma!

One of the things that was introduced last year was a class for the moms :)  Normally we are in a room, either as the teacher or a helper.  Now during one of the class hours we get the chance to be edified and blessed.  This Friday was no exception.

It can get heavy sometimes.  We mom's carry many loads and  it's wonderful to have someone come along side you and offer aide.  This class is exactly that.  Individual women, same heart, sharing Jesus and carrying each others burdens.

This particular Friday was going to be a light-hearted time.  We played the "Un-game".  It's not a competition, just answering questions and learning about one another.  One of the ladies read her question and in thinking and hearing her response, I knew immediately I had to blog about this.  Her question read, "I know God loves me because_________________."  As she answered each woman around the circle was able to share as well.  One sweet friend mentioned something that I'm sure many of us have experienced but must continually be reminded of.

There was a time in this woman's life where things were so difficult that they couldn't afford groceries.  It's a hard place to be.  A very humbling place to be.  She loved artichoke hearts and spotted them on the grocery aisle shelf.  She was with her mother-in-law (who was lovingly purchasing groceries for them) when she stopped and made a profound statement.  "One day, my pantry will be full of those little jars."  We all know, when you can't buy milk, eggs and bread, you DON'T purchase luxury items like artichoke hearts.

The next day she came home to find a bag of groceries on the kitchen table.  Within the contents of that package, she discovered a jar of these delicacies.  She questioned her husband about the possibility of her mother-in-law having dropped them off.  He stated that someone from the church had brought the bag by and left it for them.  God gave her a glimpse of hope.  A moment in time where He reached down, put His arms around her and said, "I love you, and I care about you more than you know".  It's those moments when we realize that if He cares enough to give us a jar of artichoke hearts, why would He not care about the bigger things?

For some of us, it's artichoke hearts, for some it's the $5 you find at the bottom of an old purse.  For some, it's finding a pair of cute little red shoes that fit like a glove after searching and searching and not being able to find a single pair anywhere.  It's also when you find those cute little red shoes at a thrift store for only $2 and then remember that you have a credit at said store and they are yours... free of charge.

"If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

Luke 11:13

Heavenly gates and a friend named Carolann...

I have an amazing friend. She is full of spunk and laughter, hugs and I love yous. Her name is Carolann. I met Carolann when I first moved to the Hill Country from Albuquerque 10yrs ago at the end of this month. I started attending a woman's Bible study through one of the first churches we visited. While we ended up somewhere else for a little over a year I still attended this same Bible study. I found myself to be the only youngin' of the group. :) This group of precious ladies were so willing to help me with my then 1yr old, 3yr old and 6yr old. They loved on them, encouraged me, loved on them, loved on me.... They were a rock for me through some very difficult times.


Carolann was part of this group. She had several physical conditions that didn't allow her to come every time but she did whenever she could. Through out the years I would visit with her a little here and there, but our relationship really started to grow the most about 3yrs ago. She become an adoptive mama. I became an adopted daughter. We would talk about shopping and would even manage to go a few times. See, Carolann still couldn't do much away from home. We would visit numerous times at her home or at church. Talk many times on the phone and try to do things together as much as she was able. Every time I was done spending time with her, I was in awe of how joyful she could be in spite of the many surgeries and difficulties she faced. She carried joy with her. Everywhere.


My precious friend, Carolann doesn't have to be frustrated over dentures that would never fit right, not being able to drive herself somewhere, words that would escape her though her mind went a mile a minute, or surgery after surgery, after surgery. This last week, she went into the hospital again and this time they told her that there wasn't any more they could do. We know that our Jesus is the one with the final say, and He told her that it was ok to come on home. They placed her in hospice and only a few days later, she did exactly as He told her.  She went home. I was blessed to be able to see her the morning she passed away, but that isn't how I will remember her. My memory of her smile and laugh will always carry me to a rememberance of how great our God is and perfect is His plan.


It's a strange thing this time. Death. I'm reminded of 1 Corinthians 15:55 "Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?"  Yes, there is a part of me that carries with it a sadness for the selfish fact that I won't see my friend for a while but it's not like the sadness I've encountered so many times before. Unfortunately I've seen death far too much. This time is different. Not because the situation is different or the friend is different. I think I understand that verse more this time than I ever have before. There is no sting. She's with my Jesus and she WON'T hurt EVER again! Just having that new heavenly body has got to be INCREDIBLE for her! What rejoicing is goin' on up in there!!! With her rejoicing, how can I mourn? She went through soooo much on this earth and still gave God glory and praised Him all the time. What a gorgeous example she was for me and so many others.


Thank you Carolann. For your friendship, your hugs, your laughter, your stories, your phone calls, your visits, but most of all, thank you for loving Him the way you do.

Sixteen Candles and an Angel Food Cake...

Wow! Here I sit, 12:48am knowing that we are about to embark on a new era in our lives. Today, well yesterday I guess, was the finale to our weekend celebration marking Hannah's 16th birthday. Wow! It's so hard to believe that she's 16 and I'm only 29 *giggle* Alright, I feel 29. Well honestly some days I feel 80 but my head and my heart are shouting, "29"!!! I just can't believe that she is two years away from college. COLLEGE! I'm too stinkin' young for this! There is just no way that I can have a kid in college... I mean that's for old..."er" people, right? I know the gray hairs are coming, fast!

She wants so badly to get that blasted "driver's license". Who says she should be able to drive away without me there to watch over her? Who? I'm so uncertain. I don't know how to let her go. I think this is like a "my baby's first day of school" feeling but totally on steroids! I know that I can trust God with her, but man.... I just don't know if I'm ready for all this yet.

I know God is good and in all honesty, she should never have even survived her birth and she did :) What a miracle! And she's here still, just as precious today as that itty-bitty newborn that was placed in my arms sixteen years ago. I know He loves me :D If He didn't, He would never have given such a precious bundle to me in the first place. Good heavens, college in two years, marriage, babies, oh Lord... HELP! Ok, B-R-E-A-T-H-E!!!! I guess I will take a small step back, focus on the here and now and continue to praise Him for all He has given and continues to give. He did tell me I shouldn't be anxious or worry, right? :)

So, here's to sixteen candles and an angel food cake. Thank you Jesus for every blessed candle and for every one here after! Amen!

A Question about Heaven....

Wow, I'm really out to do what Jasmine says, lol! Another blog already, oh my :O   Actually, I wish I could say this is a bubbly, happy, "look at the gorgeous sunrise", kinda post but alas, I'm keeping it real today. (KIR! Jas would be so proud!) 

 

I just received an email from my precious sister-in-law and I felt extremely compelled to share it here. My sis just lost her young, vibrant niece this summer. What a horrific situation! Beautiful 14yr old, stunningly gorgeous, her whole life ahead of her, Angel was her name. 

 

This has caused many to question, think, ponder, cry, scream, yell, curse, weep, sink into dark areas that aren't safe for anyone to be. Angel's father has been struggling with many things and sent this email out. Becki (my SIL) sent it on to me. I have shared his initial question with my answer at the end. I pray that this reaches the heart(s) God has intended it for.

A Question about Heaven

by Michael Cartwright on Wednesday, August 18, 2010 at 9:03pm

"I would like to pose a question about Heaven for my eternal compass. But, I want to preface this question with a bit of my own history.

As many may know, I have had a life-changing event that has altered the course of my existence. My daily focus has now been occupied by faith, purpose, intention and sadness.

I have realized that I've always tried to live my life as a "good" person. Whether it was how I was raised, my very nature or just happenstance. But I never thought of why...until recently. I was sort of raised Catholic but not really (baptized as an infant and attended Sunday school irregularly and an occasional Mass). I did not really look at my Christian nature until my mid twenties, and that was just a shallow glance prompted by marriage and my first child. My thirties happened fast! Learning to be a parent of three adolescents kept me on my toes, but trying to juggle partying and parenting was a moral challenge. My forties brought my faith more front and center, and taking my life inventory started to get more of my attention.

I now find myself as stated earlier in a multi-faceted focus of faith, purpose, intention and sadness. Which has me consumed with the happily-ever-after of Heaven. I do consider myself a "good" person and my Christian faith even prior to Angel's passing was taking root at a much deeper level. My faith now seems to be approaching my core and it's the only thing that keeps me going. I've asked myself, have I been a "good" person all this time, just to get into heaven when this earthly adventure ends? Or, is there MORE to my being that has driven me to be kind, giving, and as non-judgmental as possible. Or again, is it just to get into Heaven?

I know Angel is in Heaven watching over me and guiding her loved ones the best she can. And I pray that I will be with her when my journey here ends.

So my question is this: What drives you to be a "good" person regardless of your faith? Is it to get into Heaven or something else?"

My desire to be a "good" person is based solely on the fact that I have come to the realization how horrid a person I really am. I am selfish, not a good steward, mean, not loving like I should, I don't share Him like I need to, I don't call my disabled neighbor enough, I don't visit my friend in the hospital like I should, etc. I know how much Christ desires for me to do these things. I fall short. I also know that my salvation has NOTHING to do with my ability to be a "good" person. If it did, I would never make it!!!!! For all intents and purposes, most people would probably call me a "good" person. I home school my kids. I love to laugh, I love my family, I try to be a good mom and wife, sister and friend. I'm not perfect and I never will be.
 

My choice to try to do what is right, to be a "good" person is based on the fact that I love my Jesus so much because He loved me first. He has given me a command.....
 

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:36-40 (New International Version) 

After all He has done for me, His willingness to be separated from His Father, to experience that moment away from Him, that moment of complete and udder darkness, hell, torture and death... for me. How could I not have a desire to give back to Him? I believe that the Holy Spirit has moved in my life and caused me to become aware of all I have fallen short of, only to show me HOW much He has done for me. It's by returning that love and showing it to others that will share His love with them. This is what His heart is. This is what ours should be as well.
 

My choices to be that "good" person.... come from a heart that desires to bless and please my Jesus. How could I do any less? He's here, He's real and all He wants and desires is your heart. Will you give it to Him now? Unabashed, exuberantly, fully and completely? Do it now, we never know what tomorrow will bring. 

*love and hugs* 

Jen

Simple Treasure....

For those of you that don't know me, I am a mommy of three fabulous kids!

My daughter, Hannah, is soon to be 16, driving and headed to vet school. She is amazing! A true testimony to God's favor and goodness. She is incredibly bright, unbelievably smart (nothing less than A's both years of HS so far), and a blast to hang out with. She is stunningly beautiful (I think all my kids got their good looks from the hubby and smarts from me right, LOL!?)

My son, Andrew, is fantastically sweet. Eleven years old and has already skipped a grade. A best friend to many, precious beyond words, a mommy's delight. Freckled and always ready with a hug and a kiss. He's a talented drummer, loves guitar and piano, and is also very scientific. He loves to make lists, loves to dissect anything from bugs to vacuums. His sense of humor keeps us all in stitches!

My youngest, Emily, (Heaven help!!!!) just turned 10 but is going on 21. Gorgeous and cute as a button! Drama queen to the max, and has the long hair to add emphasis to ANY emotion she may be experiencing at the time. She LOVES babies and little ones. So much so that she would rather hang out with them for hours than do anything else with anyone else. She has even been paid for watching the neighbors great granddaughter while grandma recouped from a headache in the other room. She has incredible fashion sense and we ALL sense we're in for it when she gets older and can wear makeup. She is a leader to a fault (just ask her older brother) and hasn't a shy bone in her body. She just recently played the lead role in our end-of-the-year home school program and did a FABULOUS job!

You may wonder why I am telling you about my precious kiddos. They are one of the most important parts of this blog. I must lay the foundation for the most unbelievable story I'm certain I'll ever tell. If you have read my previous blog, you know about the current situation we have found ourselves in. Indescribably the most unreal moment of my life. Probably the closest to a Hollywood action scene I will ever be a part of. If you haven't read about the burning of the van, you must do so now, for this next blog is a continuation of that most implausible turn of events.

The saga continues......

The van is now quite the metal sculpture, gracing my front lawn. We have engrossed and entertained the neighborhood with our telling and retelling of the horrific ordeal. The well-wishes, hugs and offers of vehicles to borrow have been many and truly appreciated. But, the most incredible thing about this entire experience is the simple treasure we found amongst the rubble.

We decided to pick through the ashy remains inside the van, hoping to find something we believe may have been lost. We found the skeletons of our favorite umbrellas, the shards of glass and blobs of melted alloy. We pulled back the chunks of asphalt which the tow company so lovingly shoveled into the trunk area of my dodge, only to find shreds of pink and denim, fluff and plastic. All of which were meant to find their way to the consignment shop in hopes of funding next years school clothes. Nothing could have surprised us more when we discovered what lay underneath the seat where my children rode for the last 10years of "the van's" life.

Bibles. Four Bibles to be exact. ALL of which we were eventually able to open. Only to discover they had not burned all the way through. These Bibles were directly over the fuel tank. They should have been incinerated. We have been able to salvage 3 of them, the 4th was pretty much sticking to the bottom of the car and accompanying it to it's final resting place. The first of these discoveries was the most profound and the one in which this blog centers.

I was 10 years old when I earned this particular Bible. It was beautiful. A cream colored cover, with a photo of a gentle, loving Jesus on the cover. His expression was so tender while He sat, holding several children. I, of course, would often imagine myself as one of these precious little ones. Especially when I got into trouble :) This Bible was the most costly item I could have earned with my points from Sunday school. I worked so hard on my scripture memorization, bringing friends, always there rain or shine, hoping to earn enough before someone else was able to. I finally did it! It was mine. I loved that Bible! That Bible encouraged me to set up the same point system 25 years later at our own church for the elementary aged children. My youngest daughter, Emily, found a love for that Bible just as I had and she wanted to use it when we would go to church. Despite it's frailty, that Bible held up well and stayed in the van, awaiting Sunday mornings, in it's new pink, floral cover. Emily used it every Sunday and earned her own points. Unfortunately, this Bible was in the van when it perished.

Moving through the grieving process of losing the van, we felt the need to see what had been lost. Don't get me wrong, we knew how incredibly blessed we were. I had not perished, the children had not been with me, the Lord had me surrounded by amazing friends immediately after the fire started, houses were spared, my camera and several other precious things (including one of the kids Bibles AND dessert) had been spared. Life was good and we knew it. There's just something about having closure on everything. This was big.

I was poking around the ashes, looking specifically for something my son may have had in the van. It was a notebook. One that he had been writing in ever since he could do so. He LOVED lists. He had lists of numbers, lists of skateboard brands, lists of cars, alphabets (different languages), animals, illnesses (the way he tried to spell pneumonia was soooo precious!). You name it, he made a list of it. This was priceless. I wanted any piece of it I could salvage. It wasn't found. I am still praying that it is somewhere in his room, buried under a mountain of toys, not in that van under a mountain of ash and metal.

I noticed several "book" type items under the kids seat. Knowing that they were most likely Bibles, but really hoping to find the notebook, I gingerly stepped up into the van and attempted to reach through the exposed wires and open the first book. I couldn't believe my eyes!!! It was the Bible. My Bible! The page I opened to was almost in perfect condition, and the picture BLEW my mind!

In this Bible, the pictures were not in the same section as the story. I always thought that was strange. The right side of the section held the picture. It was of Jesus holding three children. This alone stopped me in my tracks. As tears spilled down my cheeks, I began to notice something about the children that were sitting with Him. The eldest was a young girl, long blondish-brown hair. She was standing in front of Jesus, staring into His eyes with rapt attention. The second oldest was a boy! He was sitting on Jesus' left knee, Jesus' arm wrapped around him. He had darker brown hair and was completely engaged, watching the third child. This child was a baby with sandy brown hair. She was as cute as a button, playing with Jesus' string on His robe. Jesus was looking upon this little one with such a look of love and joy. THESE were MY CHILDREN! They were safe! Safe in His arms. SAFE! I stood there for the longest time, no words, only sobs. I knew at that moment, I needed that Bible! I didn't care what it took, I had to get it out of the rubble. It's home needed to be with us, not at a salvage yard. I started to inspect the area to figure out the best way to retrieve it. It wasn't an easy task. The cover had melted to the floor of the van and I was so worried I would ruin the Bible trying to get it out. I decided to separate as much of the remains from the outer part as I could. It was then that I noticed the scripture on the opposite page. That did it!

As I said before, the pictures in this Bible weren't placed in correlation with the stories that they represented. They were basically scattered throughout the Word. The section of scripture where this particular picture was placed was in Jeremiah. No, not Jeremiah 29:11, that would be too easy, too general, too overused. It was Jeremiah 30:18-20. This scripture jumped out from the page at me. It was the part that was least touched by the flames. It was set aside in it's own section. It was meant for me. It was meant for US!

 " This is what the Lord says: 'I will restore the fortunes of Jacob's tents

and have compassion on his dwellings;

the city will be rebuilt on her ruins,

and the palace will stand in its proper place.

19 From them will come songs of thanksgiving

and the sound of rejoicing.

I will add to their numbers,

and they will not be decreased;

I will bring them honor,

and they will not be disdained.

20 Their children will be as in days of old,

and their community will be established before me;

I will punish all who oppress them.

WHAT A PROMISE!!!!!!! We salvaged the Bible, it will reside in a shadow box in our home. A perfect reminder of God's goodness and grace, His salvation, His provision, His love and protection. He is a good God. A wonderful God. An AMAZING God! I don't deserve His love, I should have lost everything, if not myself in that fire. He knew it would happen. He made sure my precious children weren't there. He made sure I would be taken care of. He wrapped me in love and prayer IMMEDIATELY after those flames started. He reminded me to save the camera AND dessert. He will provide a better vehicle for us. HE IS WHO I LIVE FOR! If you don't know Him, you need to..... NOW! He is waiting for you. Accept Him today. 

Tomorrow may be too late.